Tuesday, December 13, 2011

A Quiet Heart

Here I am, returning for yet another attempt at keeping this blog. I have realized that in order for me to keep up with this blog, I'm going to need to be intentional with it. No need to go into a long, dramatic, monologue of "I promise to do this, and I'm going to try to do this, and I will do this and this and this and it's going to stick this time", because knowing myself, there's a good chance it won't stick. However, I would love to be intentional with it and see how it goes. So I'm going to leave it at that!

One of my favorite theologians is Charles Spurgeon. And a dear friend of mine sent me a link to a daily little devotional called Faith's Check Book. Spurgeon had an amazing way with words...and spoke the truth and grace of God so beautifully. I love yesterday's entry on having a quiet heart. I struggle with fear, which encompasses anxiety, worry, control, and other things. In a world full of distraction, especially with technology, I find that it's difficult for me to just be still....be quiet...to listen. I love this verse & Spurgeon's words of truth:

"In quietness and in trust shall be your strength" (Isaiah 30:15 ESV)
"It is always weakness to be fretting and worrying, questioning and mis-trusting. What can we do if we wear ourselves to skin and bone? Can we gain anything by fearing and fuming? Do we not unfit ourselves for action and unhinge our minds for wise decision? We are sinking by our struggles when we might float by faith.
Oh, for grace to be quiet! Why run from house to house to repeat the weary story which makes us more and more heart-sick as we tell it? Why even stay at home to cry out in agony because of wretched forebodings which may never be fulfilled? It would be well to keep a quiet tongue, but it would be far better if we had a quiet heart. Oh, to be still and know that Jehovah is God!
Oh, for grace to be confident in God! The holy One of Israel must defend and deliver His own. He cannot run back from His solemn declarations. We may make sure that every word of His will stand though the mountains should depart. He deserves to be confided in; and if we would display confidence and consequent quietness, we might be as happy as the spirits before the throne.
Come, my soul, return unto thy rest, and lean thy head upon the bosom of the Lord Jesus."
I recently came across old journals from when I was in college. At the time, I was taking classes full-time, working part-time, and newly married. I was young and was so weary in my walk with Christ. I felt as if every entry was the same thing. The same worries. The same anxieties over things I could not control. Depression. I was fearing and fuming over and over and over again. I did not know what it meant to rest. To be still. To rest in the Lord's goodness. To rest in His abounding grace and mercy that He richly bestows up on me daily and freely gives to me by nothing I've done. I was faithless and sinking by my struggles. Over the last several years through different seasons of life, the Lord has graciously revealed to me my lack of faith. He has shown me that through the good times, and the not so good times, all is grace. There is hope in Christ. Through the struggles, I can know in my heart, that the Lord is working for my good. And it's all for His glory. I still struggle, because my flesh still wants that control. I am quick to forget all that I am and all that I have in Christ. I must pick up my cross daily. I pray for the grace to be quiet. To be still. To trust. To rest.

{All is Grace}